A new kind of love

Today has been an emotional day. A wonderfully emotional day. My heart is so full, I could burst!
My fear of "going public" is gone. I exposed a part of me that is usually saved for closest family members and friends -- and it is liberating!

This journey of ours has been rough, but we've had plenty of help along the way.
After becoming a mother, I discovered a kind of love that I had not yet felt, or anticipated. It is the love you feel for people who love your children. I am talking about teachers, aides, therapists, doctors, clergy, friends, extended family, and the list goes on. As parents, we are wired to love our children from the moment their lives begin -- those around us have to want to love our children. There is a special place in heaven for people who choose to work with, and love special-needs children. Brandon spends the majority of the week in the hands of teachers and aides who are priceless. He has been in full-day school since the day he turned 3.

I still cringe to think of that fateful day. He ate his oatmeal for breakfast, put on his sweatshirt (which was a battle even then), and I walked him out to the bus, and handed him off to a stranger. Nothing prepares you to watch your 3-year-old baby's fuzzy head drive away on a big huge bus. I may not have survived that moment if I did not believe he was going somewhere safe and loving.

Years have passed, teachers and classrooms have changed -- and one thing remains the same -- he is always surrounded by love. We have been lucky enough to have aides in our home, and every one of them has been wonderful. Granted, Brandon is easy to love. He is very affectionate, and always happy to hug and cuddle. This is not very characteristic of children with Autism, so we consider it a huge blessing. Even after his worst tantrums, he wants to be held and loved -- which is usually as healing for him as it is for the person holding him.

I think of the tantrums he has at school and church -- the ones I never see. I think of the arms holding him tight, the calm voices and gentle hands; keeping him safe -- even from himself.
He is surrounded by love.

So, thank you to those of you who know and love Brandon -- those who have worked with him at school and church, and the special family members and friends who step in at a moments notice to offer relief and support. We could not survive this without you. Your place in our hearts is permanent, even if we part ways in this life.
Also, thank you to those who have never met Brandon, but have shown our family love through your generosity. We will never forget how we felt today -- thanks to you.